Be the Cat's Meow

It’s the End of the World as We Know It (and I Feel Fine)

Posted on: 05/20/2011

I would just like to know about the evolution of the significance of Saturday, May 21. How did it go from being the Rapture to the Zombie Apocalypse? Or is this origin of all the “Zombie Jesus” talk?

Christian ministry radio station leader Harold Camping, of Family Radio, started preaching his message of the Rapture (to be followed by the end of the world October 21) back in January. The “all-knowing” Camping bases his certainty on a mathematical equation based on 7,000 years after the flood of Noah’s Ark. Now exactly what his equation is or how he obtained it is another story. Perhaps his meeting with God was similar to that of Joseph Smith, but that in itself is another story…

What I do know, after 12 years of Catholic schooling, is the Bible claims that only God knows when Judgement Day is. I am also pretty sure the anti-Christ is supposed to present himself before any of this takes place (and no Snooki is not the anti-Christ). I can’t tell you the exact passage nor do I feel like looking for it, but ask anyone else familiar with the Bible and they will tell you the same.

I also know that Camping has a civil engineer background and (it gets better) he predicted the Rapture back in 1994…oh wait, what year is it now? 2011? So, 1994 came and went and life continued? If you don’t believe me you can buy Camping’s book about this end of days event which never happened. He says it was due to “mathematical error,” and now,

“Beyond the shadow of a doubt, May 21 will be the date of the Rapture and the day of judgment” (Huffington Post).

Somehow all this Rapture talk prompted the Center for Disease Control to (quietly, mind you) post Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse. The CDC was kind enough to provide a brief history of zombies,  suggested emergency kit items and emergency plan. Now I don’t even know where to begin with this. How did we go from the coming of Jesus to zombie takeover? I’m not sure what lines were blurred together for that to even happen. Naturally, certain people (like my mother), tend to have anxiety attacks over this sort of pandemonium, which blows things even more out of proportion.

The bottom-line is none of us will know the fate of May 21st until, wait for it, Saturday, May 21st. Sure you can believe what you want and take whatever precaution you find necessary, but keep your panic attacks to yourself. Think about what happened with Y2K and 6.6.06- that’s right, nothing happened. Some people chose to freak out and it was all for nothing. Plus, if something really does happen it’s more difficult to think rationally when you are having an anxiety attack.

I apologize in advance if I am wrong and the zombie-rapture-whatever takes place. Just remember, you can outrun a zombie if all else fails. In the meantime, I just plan to watch this as much as possible through tomorrow:

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