Be the Cat's Meow

Archive for December 2012

These days I feel like I am turning into Carrie Bradshaw- or should I say I am getting Carrie-ed away?

Sorry, I had to go there…

Winter’s entrance indicates the rapidly approaching holiday season. A time for cheerful decor, cozy clothing and, of course, plenty of festivities. I’m all for celebrations, especially those that involve eating and drinking, but I don’t understand why all these gatherings have morphed into couple events. 

I thought the holidays were about spending time with those you love? Wouldn’t this imply that you don’t necessarily need a plus one? After all, you can love someone that isn’t necessarily your lover.

I guess I am just tried of getting invites and being told, “you can bring a date.” 

…Hmm….

Okay:

1) I am not dating and anyone that knows me knows that.

2) Why the hell would I drag a first date to some holiday party where even I don’t know everyone there?

3) Do you think I would use a holiday party as an excuse to find a date??

Maybe I am just being bitter after being overloaded with seasonal stock images such as:

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or even this older couple frolicking on a grassy knoll:

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I want to frolic too..is that too much to ask? I guess I should say, I want to be able to frolic alone without people feeling sorry for me.

In closing, I have one Christmas wish for all the couples out there,

…of course I still have wishes for the masses- world peace, happiness, the norm…

anyways, my one wish for couples:

Can you please embrace us single folk as we are and simply let us be solo at your holiday events? We obviously love you if we show up as the lone ranger at your party, so let’s leave the dating discussion for another day or, say, never.

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It is surreal when you reach the point in life where things start falling into place for your “circles.” The last round of folks are beginning their college careers, those that have graduated are now finding their niche, families are being made, etc.

I can’t help, but feel grateful for it all and excited about the future. I don’t have a wedding ring or family to show off, but I do have a solid career, expanding my artistic opportunities, own a house and feel healthier and happier than ever. Truth be told, maybe there are still pieces of me that are sad, but I have learned to keep on keeping on, because that is all you can do.

Anyways, thinking about the present reminded me of my bumpy past. It definitely was not easy getting to this point. I took some wrong turns and trusted some wrong people, but that is all behind me for the best.

I was self-destructive, and I can only blame myself there, but I also wanted to believe that all people are inherently good. That being said, I ate up the bullshit asshole people fed me and, unfortunately, let these bad influences into my life.

I have no regrets, everything made me who I am today, but I sure as hell would LOOOOOOOVE to see some of these jerks again to punch them in the face!! It would go a little something like this:

“Hey, thanks for pretending to care about me & be my friend, when I needed it, only to find out you were trying to end my relationship and get in my pants AND bragging about it.” **BOOM**

“Hey, thanks for being a junkie boyfriend, diluting my reality and having the nerve to say I messed you up. Boy, you was already MESSED up.” **BOOM**

“Hey, thanks for making me your scapegoat in high school and making those years even more miserable than necessary.” **BOOM**

“Hey, thanks for saying ‘you’ll be there,’ and never actually meaning it, even when I was extremely depressed and needed it most.” **BOOM**

“Hey, thanks for choosing drugs over our friendship and never admitting that you actually did AND NOW you continue to pretend that never happened.” **BOOM**

“Hey, thanks for walking all over me all those years while being judgemental since I don’t fit the ‘mold’.” **BOOM**

I could probably come up with more, but those are the key people I would just like to say WTF too. F* you for being an asshole & good riddance! Plus, I know I am in a better place than ALL OF THEM now. I would LOVE to wipe the smug smiles off their faces and let them know all their trash talking didn’t hold me down.

Wow, writing this was almost as therapeutic as punching someone in the face! …or at least how I would imagine it…

It just goes to show, I don’t care who you are or where you’re from…

….wait, the Backstreet Boys said that, not me….

okay, I say, it does not matter what happened in your past. You can hold onto your mistakes and fall into some downward spiral OR you can grow from then and learn to be better as a result! Then, you can look back and remind yourself, I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF THESE ASSHOLES!!

Heck, writing is one of the best forms of therapy, so unleash all that bitterness into something fierce! They’ll never read it and if they do maybe they will realize what an worthless asshole they were (/are).

The other day a friend, that is a student, dropped by my office.

We caught up & he asked how other friends in my circle are doing and I filled him in. He was quiet for a second and then said, “That’s cool you guys are doing grown-up things, but don’t act ‘grown-up.’ ”

He left shortly after that and I thought about what he said. At first, that seemed like the last thing I wanted to hear. Based on looks I can pass for a 20 year old and I am nearly 30- don’t I want to act “grown-up” to make up for my youthful appearance? How am I supposed to be taken seriously if my  mannerisms aren’t “grown-up”? I don’t consider myself immature, but I’m not a “stuffy” grown-up.

The more I thought about it, the more it made sense.

My friend, for example, is a student in his late 20s. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing by any means. He just falls into the category of Y’s/millenials that either a) decided to go to college later in life or b) returned to college after dropping out years ago. Kudos to everyone that takes that plunge no matter what age!

The advantage of going to college straight out of high school is that the experience definitely shapes you for adulthood. It prepares you to jump through hoops & work your ass off, yet you can also gain expertise in balancing/juggling work & play. Come on, work hard play hard is the only way! Not to mention you learn that, unfortunately, (and hopefully by witnessing not doing) kissing ass can get you too far- even if you are some dim-witted asshat.

So I guess, in a way college helps you become a “grown-up.”

After graduation you get thrown to the wolves world and try to find your place. Well, at least you should take that course of action. It seems the sad truth is many of my peers seem to do what they think they should be doing. Following this logic these types of people would also, presumably, resort to behaving as a “grown-up;” i.e. acting stuffy, taking things to seriously and fusing one’s true identity with their work persona. That being said, this category of people can be labeled as  grown-ups acting “grown-up,” but not in a good way.

I don’t live to work. What a waste of life! I mean it’s one thing doing what you love, but that is the key thing- you should be doing what you love! Even if it means dressing up your cats, playing video games, roughhousing with sports, laughing at fart jokes, collecting Hello Kitty toys, playing dress-up, making art, dancing all night, etc. etc. Yes, those are all things I do and I love it. Plus I hold down a full time job, so I guess therein lies me being a grown-up without acting like one!

And that is fabulous!

Some of the most admirable & youthful people I know range from ages 60-90.  They definitely fall into the non-grownup category, but hey, goes to show age is just a number!

Cheers to all the newfound “grown-ups” particularly the dreamers, gamers, lovers, athletes, nerds, fun-seekers, writers, performers and everyone else young at heart. Be proud to be an adult without acting like a stiff jerk!


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